What are the best dating apps for open relationships?

Started by KelseyA · ·10 replies ·Niche & Community Dating

#compare #app #poly

KelseyA
Joined Oct 2021
936 posts
#1

Been chewing on best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community dating | for the better part of two years after reading far too many roundups, and a couple of things stood out.

The detail that ruins it is that the photo verification step surfaces profiles that have not been touched in months, especially once working out what is actually different comes into it.

Where I would value another read, particularly for ENM daters:

  • Is that a regional thing if you are dealing with working out what is actually different?
  • Is that still true for polyamorous people?
  • Has anyone found the opposite with swipe apps?
  • Has anyone found the opposite given working out what is actually different?
  • Is that a regional thing outside the area you actually search in?

Direct experience of best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community dating | is what I am after.

SeanO
Joined Jul 2020
337 posts
#2

Is that a regional thing given working out what is actually different?

On balance, the marketing on the homepage gets the credit but how quickly you reply does the work on swipe apps.

The thing I did not expect was that the support inbox makes it impossible to tell live accounts from dead ones, especially once working out what is actually different comes into it.

Open to being wrong where working out what is actually different is concerned.

ColinR
Joined Dec 2017
369 posts
#3

Something worth knowing: on swipe apps, how long you leave a conversation running makes more difference than the number of prompts you filled in, though a friend had the reverse experience where working out what is actually different is concerned.

Rendate has been the steadier of the ones I run purely on how busy it is locally.

Does anyone know if that still holds given working out what is actually different?

ColbyR
Joined Apr 2022
2,943 posts
#4

Broadly agreed — @ColinR, the point about working out what is actually different is underrated.

The detail that ruins it is that the block function collapses once you move outside a major city, which is the real problem with swipe apps.

Curious what others found on the this whole area question.

OliviaOnline
Joined Jul 2021
1,090 posts
#5

Strongly agree — @ColbyR, the note on swipe apps is the part people miss.

Rewriting the opener turned it from a chore into something workable with best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community dating |.

Someone pointed me at Flurrydate if you want something to compare against.

LandonH
Joined Feb 2019
2,563 posts
#6

The pattern I keep seeing is that how specific you are about what you want makes more difference than the total registered user count, though it varies enormously by city for polyamorous people.

Datedesire has been the steadier of the ones I run purely on how busy it is locally.

QuinnB
Joined Jan 2023
220 posts
#7

Seconding this — @SeanO, the bit about local activity is underrated.

Something worth knowing: how quickly you reply matters more than whether it has a swipe interface.

For ENM daters, putting one specific interest in the bio was the only change that showed up in the numbers on swipe apps.

Worth a look at EZHookups as well if you're building a shortlist.

MitchellS
Joined Oct 2023
838 posts
#8

Same experience here — @ColinR, the remark about filters is exactly right.

The pattern I keep seeing is that the willingness to suggest meeting early outweighs whether it has a swipe interface in the best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community dating | context.

What nobody mentions is that the notification system treats a fifty-mile radius as a suggestion — and nobody mentions it when they talk about working out what is actually different.

Practical notes on working out what is actually different:

  • Say what you want in the first two lines, which matters most on swipe apps.
  • Screenshot anything odd before blocking — with best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community dating | this is the difference-maker.
  • Let a stalled conversation go — with that side of it this is the difference-maker.
  • Put something concrete in the opener, and doubly so for ENM daters.
  • Give a platform three weeks before judging it, especially for ENM daters.

Been running Souldate in parallel and it turned out to be worth the ten minutes.

Happy to be argued with where working out what is actually different is concerned.

KelseyA
Joined Oct 2021
936 posts
#9

My sticking point is that on swipe apps, the match queue resets every time the app updates.

For what it is worth, for polyamorous people, how well a platform handles reports tends to decide whether anything reaches a first meeting for ENM daters.

That is where I've got to on the community dating | question.

SeanO
Joined Jul 2020
337 posts
#10

Is that worth the time investment with swipe apps?

The one change that worked was dropping the filters — it stopped the conversations dying at day two for ENM daters.

For what it is worth, nothing changes how many replies you get in a week as much as how quickly you reply, but that is one person with one set of results.

What actually held up on best dating apps for open relationships? — niche & community datin specifically:

  • Check when the account was last active, and doubly so for ENM daters.
  • Set a daily time limit — it is the difference between a reply and silence.
  • Tell a friend where you're going — the alternative wastes weeks.
ColinR
Joined Dec 2017
369 posts
#11

Seconding this — @KelseyA, the framing around ENM daters matches my experience.

As far as I can tell, how long you leave a conversation running counts for more than whether it has a swipe interface for ENM daters on swipe apps.

Flurrydate is another to throw in the mix — free to browse and message, which is the main thing.

Would that apply in a smaller town with swipe apps?

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