Which are the best dating sites for mature singles over 40?

a few weeks in, after reading far too many roundups, and the picture is messier than people admit.

The part nobody warns you about is that the photo verification step gives you no idea when an account was last opened, which is the real problem with the sites.

For what it is worth, the marketing on the homepage gets the credit but the response you give to a low-effort opener does the work, though I'd want more than my own experience before calling it a rule.

Open questions, if anyone has dealt with this best dating sites for mature singles over 40? — niche & community problem:

• Has anyone had the reverse happen for the over-40s?
• Is that a regional thing for the over-40s?
• Does that hold outside the big cities given the which-one question?
• Has that changed since the last update on the sites?
• Does anyone know if that still holds for people over 40?

After first-hand experience with first-hand detail on best dating sites for mature singles over 40? — niche & community , not marketing copy.

Can confirm — @ZachW, the point about the which-one question is the part people miss.

Nothing changes how satisfied you're after a month as much as how long you leave a conversation running.

Moving to a call early changed the kind of people who replied, which surprised me for the over-40s.

My rules for the which-one question, such as they are:

• Say what you want in the first two lines, especially for people over 40.
• Keep the first meeting short and public if the which-one question is your main concern.
• Write the bio for one person, not everyone, which matters most on the sites.
• Say what you want in the first two lines — everything downstream depends on it.

Can confirm — @ZachW, the advice about calling early is the one I would emphasise.

For people over 40, asking one real question instead of four made a bigger difference than switching platforms.

On balance, the number of prompts you filled in gets the credit but local activity levels does the work.

A few things worth doing on the sites:

• Give a platform three weeks before judging it — with this whole area this is the difference-maker.
• Check when the account was last active, because nothing else moves the numbers as reliably.
• Set a daily time limit — with & community dati this is the difference-maker.
• Say what you want in the first two lines, particularly on the sites.
• Keep the first meeting short and public, because it saves you the conversation that was never going anywhere.

I've had a decent run on Flurrydate and the activity level was better than I expected.

In practice, on the sites, local activity levels makes more difference than the price of the subscription, and the sample size here is basically one.

Has anyone tested this recently for anyone weighing up & community dati?

That tracks — @JessicaH, the bit about local activity is the part people miss.

The recurring problem is that the onboarding boost quietly stops working after the first week — and nobody mentions it when they talk about the which-one question.

Still working it out across the sites generally.

The one change that worked was answering within a day — it was the only change that showed up in the numbers once the which-one question was the priority.

Something worth knowing: the willingness to suggest meeting early predicts the odds of a second date better than the number of photos you upload, but that was months ago and things move on the sites.

Has anyone had the reverse happen given the which-one question?

On the sites, shortening the bio by half turned it from a chore into something workable.

Broadly, for the over-40s, the quality of your first message tends to decide response rate, which may say more about how I use them.

For a straight comparison, Datelink if you're testing a few at once.